‎8/12/12

I have bad news and good news. Jason fell yesterday after getting out of bed. He started to lose his balance and before I could grab him he fell forward into the wall and window hitting his head and scraping his knees. For me, it was just like the other time he fell. I was telling him to lie down because he was trying to get up and was shaking so badly I wasn't sure if this was a seizure or not.

I took him to the ER where they did a CT scan. It revealed a small amount of bleeding in a couple of area's on the right side of his head (where he had surgery). They sent the scans over to Dr Baird who reviewed them and according to the ER Dr (which I didn't like one bit) he said that it wasn't too worrisome (not sure exactly what that means - bleeding to me is worrisome). 

The good news

 is that Jason said that yesterday was the best he has felt in a while....minus falling of course. We were just talking about going to feed the ducks and Makaylin and I were singing Adele's song "crazy for you" to him right before he fell. He says even after he fell that he felt fine.

So my worst nightmare about returning to work has now come true….what if he were to fall and no one was here to help him? If anyone is willing to help us I would really appreciate it. I can’t tell you how scary it is to watch him fall face first toward the wall….twice now. I am so worried that one of these times (God forbid this happen again) that he could end up really really hurting himself.

Family and friends – please let me know if you can help be here for him. I have set up a schedule and will be trying to fill the time when I am away from work. My brother has been here most of the time and I will be asking him what times/days he won’t be here so I know when I need someone to come over. I know for sure I will need someone on the 14th. Thank you in advance for your help.

‎8/8/12

Jason has been extremely tired and sleeps 16-22 hours a day. I am not sure if it is the aftermath of the radiation treatments, normal healing, or a combination of everything. He hasn't eaten much in the last 24 hours and the Cellect that he took tonight with his vitamins made him throw up. I am guessing it was because he hadn't eaten anything. Hopefully he is feeling better tomorrow. 

This week has been really hard. Monday I went to work and was crying at my desk talking to my friend because I am just having a hard time dealing with everything. I really am trying to hold it together but this new reality of working, taking & picking up Makaylin everyday, getting home late and then trying to find time for the kids is really exhausting. If it wasn't for my brother being here since I returned to work I would be a bigger mess than I am. Thanks Jes ♥ 

I got a message from CTCA that they are trying to schedule Jason's surgery to replace his skull flap on 9/14. Jason will need to have a CT scan that will allow them to make him a custom skull flap. I have concerns about them replacing it with anything other than his real skull, but his surgeon said that once it is removed it is dead anyway.

We found a company that offers free flights for cancer patients. It is called Corporate Angels (thanks Bonnie). We have to register with them 3 weeks before we need to fly out so hopefully CTCA will let me know by the end of this week.

I have left his surgeon 2 messages asking for more details about his MRI, the skull flap and the possibility of swelling causing complications....I have not received a call back yet. It is hard to be patient during this time in our lives. 

Thanks to all the wonderful people that have helped us and continue to help us! I don't wish this upon any of you but I hope you know that if you ever needed us we would be there for you as you have been here for us. 

I have learned how precious life is and how most people take it for granted, including me. I would encourage all of you to make sure that you tell the people that you love you love them and enjoy the simple things in life. Don't put off something you want to do because you think you can't do it. The week before Jason starting experiencing headaches we had talked about going down to the Great Cat Worlds Park. We were both on vacation for a week. We talked about it and realized it how much it cost to go and decided against it, as we were saving for our wedding that was planned for 6/20/13. I can't tell you how much I regret not going. 

I also realize that we are not the only ones that are being faced with a life threatening illness. I have been reading other people's stories on indiegogo and I am so heartbroken. I have read many stories but one story broke my heart into pieces. Tammara is pregnant with her first baby, Annabella Rose. She recently found out her daughter has Ectopa Cordi, which means her heart has developed outside of her chest cavity. Not only that but her liver has done the same. Her baby has a 0% chance of survival. I reached out to her through FB and let her know how sorry I was for what she was going through. I can't even imagine. I wish things didn't have to be this way for us.....as I wish things didn't have to be the way they are for an innocent baby. I try to find the reason's for these things but it is so hard. 

Again, thank you for your continued support. I am afraid our journey will be long but will be a journey worth while especially when the day comes that we can say that the MRI shows no more cancer and Jason is back doing the things he loves to do.

‎8/2/12

We had Jason's MRI images sent to Tulsa for Dr Baird to review. His response to Jason's nurse nagivator @ CTCA was "MRI looks great, no concerns" Which is amazing news but I was hoping he would tell us more details. I am going to call him directly just to see if I can find out anything else. 

Today is my 3rd day back at work. Jesse Garratt (My wonderful brother!) has been at our house this week helping Jason. Thank you Jes!!!

Check out what Julie Lipchitz made! It is great! Thanks Julie!

Help Strike Out Cancer

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Please save the date and attend this event to help Jason.  

September 29th 5:30-8:30 pm